How do you screw up a movie starring Billy Porter, Idina Menzel, Minnie Driver, Pierce Brosnan? Well if you want to know the answer to this you just need to watch Amazon's lacklustre, jukebox take on the famous fairytale. It doesn't take much into the runtime before it becomes clear Cinderella isn't going to take itself seriously and doesn't have the camp heart to be muster anything more than a rare chuckle here and there. It recycles karaoke versions of decades old pop songs with little to no inspiration to them. The script is laden with platitude feminism and there is absolutely no chemistry in the cast. Almost everything about Cinderella feels half-assed.
Camila Cabello is passable but has no real spark as the central character. She doesn't break out as having much potential as an actress or comedian. She manages okay but has too many overly dramatic arm waiving, lip trembling moments to be taken too seriously. Even Cabello's original songs are just "meh" with little to none of the flare she's exhibited in her recording career.
The vanilla Galitzine tries desperately to be funny but is so transparent he fades into the background. There is a moment in the film when the cast sings What a Man about him but the film does nothing to make him seem in anyway interesting or redeeming.
The film takes far too long to get to its one redeeming quality, Porter's Fabulous Godmother. He flies in, brings some joy into a rather joyless production and then flies out all too fleetingly. But even he is punished by the film's lack of artfulness. His musical number is too short and just has him walking in a circle.
Cringey they name is Cinderella...
Cinderella
Starring: Camila Cabello, Nicholas Galitzine, Idina Menzel, Pierce Brosnan, Billy Porter, Mini Driver, Maddie Baillio, Charlotte Spencer, James Cordon, Tallulah Greive, Ben Bailey Smith
Writer/Director: Kay Cannon
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